How Can I Possibly Forgive?

Grace to you and peace from God our Father and from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.

Last week’s sermon began with this question: “what do you do when your brother or sister in Christ does something against you in word or action?”  The point of the sermon was to keep going back to that other person, again and again, always seeking to restore the relationship – not just the relationship with you, but with Christ Himself. Then, during the week, someone asked, “That gave me a lot to think about, bBut I have just one question…how do you forgive someone who sins against you?” That, then, becomes the question we face in this morning’s continuation from Matthew 18: how can I possibly forgive someone when they sin against me?

How, indeed. This is probably the hardest struggle for us as Christians because we take Jesus at His Word, you must forgive those who sin against you or you, too, shall perish. As we should, we take forgiveness seriously. We must be forgiving people, always - not seven times, or seventy-seven times, or even seventy-times-seven times. I know: there are lots of issues, lots of pieces to the story that each of us tell, the “what abouts,” or the “but this happened,” or “he refuses to admit he did this,” or “but it still hurts,” or even, “I don’t know if I can forgive, even though I want to.” I understand. I wrestle with this too. There is a person who hurt my father in 1986, when I was twelve, and when I see this individual, I still see red, albeit a lighter shade than it used to be. We could do a half-dozen sermons just coming from these fifteen verses, let alone all of chapter 18, and each would address an important piece of the life of forgiveness in the life of a Christian. Maybe, someday, we’ll do that. But for now, let’s simply take the question of “How?” How, in terms of spiritual power, how is it possible for a Christian to forgive those who sin against you.

The answer comes from verse 33 which, ironically, is a question. I’m going to clean it up a little bit to make it clearer. “Isn’t it necessary, then, that you have mercy on your fellow slave even as I have had mercy on you?” The answer is rhetorical: yes - it is necessary that the mercy you have received becomes mercy you then give. The power, then, behind “how to forgive?” rests in this: by holding on to the mercy you have received from Christ and never, ever forgetting the mercy flows from Christ first.

Jesus’ parables are designed to give us insight into the kingdom of God and the reign of God in Christ Jesus. Most parables, if not all, have to do with God’s gift of mercy. The parable of the sower: how God freely distributes mercy. The parable of the prodigal son: how God’s mercy is always yearning for the prodigal to return. The parable of the lost sheep: how Christ seeks out the lost one to shower mercy upon the sheep in danger of death. You see the pattern.

This parable is no different. A king seeks to shower mercy on someone who owes him ten thousand talents. I’ve seen varying figures on what this debt might have amounted to. Remember, in parables, Jesus often uses an absurd detail to demonstrate the magnitude of His mercy, so I am going to use the most absurd possibility for the value that I found in my studies for this sermon: it would take a day laborer over sixteen years to earn one talent. This man owes ten thousand talents. Do the math, and that’s more than 164,000 years; over 60 million days of labor. Translate that into today’s economy and it’s over four trillion dollars – a four followed by twelve zeros. And the wicked servant dares beg for patience so he could pay it back. Yeah, right.

The servant misunderstands. In his world, it’s about paying what you owe and owing what you pay and to do this, sometimes you negotiate for a better deal or more time. The King’s rule, however, is not built on patience. It is, however, built on and grounded in mercy. Mercy is not getting what you deserve. It is only in such a kingdom of mercy where, in the first place, a single servant would be allowed to accrue debt equal to a quarter of our national debt. There is an invitation, a welcome for the servant: come, live in my kingdom of mercy. The debt is insurmountable; surely, servant, you can see that. I forgive the debt. I enwrap you in mercy. You are freed from the burden. Depart in peace.

Mercy is that powerful. It is so powerful that it sent Jesus to call out to tax collectors and sinners, “I desire mercy, not sacrifice.” Mercy is so powerful that it sends Jesus to bring rest to the weary, true sabbath, because God desires mercy and not sacrifice. Mercy has a name. Its name is Jesus. So, Peter is not allowed calculate things out in advance, laying out his spreadsheet of maximum sins committee verses sins forgiven. Peter cannot limit what the powerful force of what Jesus is and what Jesus does and what no one can stop. Jesus knew what it would take. Jesus knows what it took. Jesus went; He sold everything He had to purchase the mercy payment for our debt. It took everything He had, including His life. Why? Because He saw our debt. He had compassion because we could not pay the death-debt, the wages of our sins. He had mercy. He took the debt away. That’s how strong mercy is. It’s stronger than sin. It's stronger than death. Mercy has risen. Mercy lives. It has risen indeed. Alleluia. And that mercy has come to me and it has come to you. That mercy, remember, is Jesus.

So, let me ask a question, then, that makes sense only in the terms of this mercy. “Isn’t it necessary, then, that you have mercy on your fellow slave even as Jesus has had mercy on you?”

The answer is “Yes.” When you cling to the mercy, then you let go of revenge. When you cling to the mercy, you let go of the score sheet. When you cling to the mercy, you stop counting. When you cling to the mercy given you by the Father, you forgive.

Forgiveness is a specific type of mercy. If mercy is not getting what you deserve, forgiveness is not exercising retribution and retaliation that, according to both the rule of man and the Law of God, is fairly deserved.  Like I said, there are lots of pieces in the narrative of forgiving brothers and sisters and Christ, and there are lots of stories that need to be told, heard, and addressed in the name of Jesus. If you are struggling with forgiving someone, start with yourself and hearing God’s Word of forgiveness for you. What you hear on a Sunday is good, right, and salutary, but sometimes you need it just for yourself and what is weighing on your conscience. Come see me and hear the Word of God for you: that God’s forgiveness, bestowed in Jesus, forgives completely and utterly, as far as the east from the west. While there may be temporal consequences, this side of heaven, they do not last into eternity. So, having received this mercy, this forgiveness from God Himself in Christ Jesus, and having been set free yourself, you exercise mercy, you set your brother or your sister free. You forgive.

When God’s mercy softens your heart, even when it is hard to forgive, and when you don’t know when the hurt will stop, and when forgiving makes no sense at all, God opens your lips. You echo the Psalmist’s cry, “O Lord, open my lips.” Jesus asks, “Isn’t it necessary?” And with lips opened by the Spirit of God, we say, “Yes, yes it is necessary.” Is it necessary to show mercy? Yes, I’ve been shown it, so I will show it. Do I forgiven? Yes, I have been forgiven, so I will forgive. Does it make sense? It makes sense because you say it, Jesus. Have mercy on me that I may show mercy to others.

In the Biblical times, there was a specific place in the Holies of Holies in the Temple called the hilasterion, literally “the mercy seat.” It’s the locatedness, the place, where God promised to be and from whence His mercy would be distributed. Our mercy-seat is found in Christ, and that same mercy is here for you here today. That same power is in these words, it is in His promise, it is in bread and it is in wine and it is in His Body and in His Blood. Come to the place of mercy. Bring your debt, your weakness, your fears, your desire yet seeming inability to show mercy, bring your nothingness to the mercy of Jesus. He promises that His mercy is strong for you and it flows through you to those who also need mercy: in the name of the Father and of the Son + and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.